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yeovil r the best
Joined: 22 Jan 2006
Posts: 13
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| Posted: Tue Jan 24, 2006 7:32 pm Post subject: Classic Joke |
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| Joke: Two men walk into a bar...............would of thought one of 'em would have seen it |
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bowerboy
Joined: 08 Jan 2006
Posts: 619
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| Posted: Wed Jan 25, 2006 10:06 am Post subject: |
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Police are searching for a thief who robs his victims by threatening them with a lighted match.
They want to catch him before he strikes again |
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darren
Joined: 28 Dec 2005
Posts: 335
Location: Yeovil, Somerset
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| Posted: Wed Jan 25, 2006 11:18 am Post subject: Re: Classic Joke |
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I bought a bureau the other day. I opened it up and 14 people fell out.
It seems it was a missing person's bureau.... |
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bowerboy
Joined: 08 Jan 2006
Posts: 619
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| Posted: Wed Jan 25, 2006 11:24 am Post subject: |
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| Earlier today, police arrested a car battery and a firework (unlikely, I know!) - They have charged one and let the other one off. |
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macphisto
Joined: 08 Jan 2006
Posts: 440
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| Posted: Wed Jan 25, 2006 11:47 am Post subject: Re: Classic Joke |
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If restaurants functioned like Microsoft......
Customer: Waiter!
Waiter: Hi, my name is Bill, and I'll be your Support Waiter. What seems to be the problem?
Customer: There's a fly in my soup!
Waiter: Try again, maybe the fly won't be there this time.
Customer: No, it's still there.
Waiter: Maybe it's the way you're using the soup; try eating it with a fork instead.
Customer: Even when I use the fork, the fly is still there.
Waiter: Maybe the soup is incompatible with the bowl; what kind of bowl are you using?
Customer: A SOUP bowl!
Waiter: Hmmm, that should work. Maybe it's a configuration problem; how was the bowl set up?
Customer: You brought it to me on a saucer; what has that to do with the fly in my soup?!
Waiter: Can you remember everything you did before you noticed the fly in your soup?
Customer: I sat down and ordered the Soup of the Day!
Waiter: Have you considered upgrading to the latest Soup of the Day?
Customer: You have more than one Soup of the Day each day??
Waiter: Yes, the Soup of the Day is changed every hour.
Customer: Well, what is the Soup of the Day now?
Waiter: The current Soup of the Day is tomato.
Customer: Fine. Bring me the tomato soup, and the bill. I'm running late now.
Waiter leaves and returns with another bowl of soup and the bill.
Waiter: Here you are, Sir. The soup and your bill.
Customer: This is potato soup.
Waiter: Yes, the tomato soup wasn't ready yet.
Customer: Well, I'm so hungry now, I'll eat anything.
Waiter leaves.
Customer: Waiter! There's a gnat in my soup!
The bill:
Soup of the Day ................................... £5.00
Upgrade to newer Soup of the Day .................. £2.50
Access to support ................................. £10.00 |
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bowerboy
Joined: 08 Jan 2006
Posts: 619
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| Posted: Wed Jan 25, 2006 11:53 am Post subject: |
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I have a load of these silly jokes! :lol:
Two boll weevils grew up in South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and became a famous actor. The other stayed behind in the cotton fields and never amounted to much. The second one, naturally, became known as the lesser of two weevils. |
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